- This Rachel Macy Stafford article from June on parenting grown children really hit home for me. It's something I've been thinking a lot about, especially since my oldest graduates from college next year. How do I let go yet still hold on as he enters true independence? Rachel's article resonated with me because she's going through it right now. I've also been remembering Gretchen Rubin's father's advice about switching from being an advisor to being a cheerleader. And wondering, when do you make that switch? Is now the time? I think it might be, and I've been trying to wrap my brain around what that looks like.
It's not that I've been much of a helicopter parent, especially since the kids started college. They've chosen their own courses and activities, and even their own living situations. If they've asked for advice, we've given it, but otherwise the only say we've had has been financial (e.g., "that apartment would be too expensive"). But reading about Rachel's daughter graduating from college and now living on her own in a city where she doesn't know anyone scares me a little. I'm hoping that the more I work things out in my head now, the less tightly I'll need to hold on when my son graduates. - I love Rachel so much that I pay to be a part of her Treehouse group on Substack, and in addition to helping me with her own work, she's introduced me to other teachers. One is psychiatrist Phil Stutz (his name might be familiar from a Netflix documentary about him, although I haven't watched it). Brene Brown also mentions him in her book Strong Ground,* so I went looking for podcasts with him. I listened to this Compassion in Action episode and it has spurred me into action (hence me writing - and publishing - this post). If you need a kick in the butt, maybe it'll help you too.
- I finally got around to watching The Sheep Detectives* on Amazon Prime and loved it. I did a quick no-spoilers review for a friend with an 8-year-old, which was, "You have to be ok with murder as the main storyline and one sheep dying to protect other sheep (but there's zero goriness), otherwise it's great for kids." When I told my husband, he recommended Kids in Mind as a site that provides extremely detailed reviews for parents.
- If you're local, you can find volunteer opportunities via L.A. Works. During the World Cup, I volunteered at a watch party sponsored by the city. Right now, opportunities include food distribution, home building, gardening and much more.
- I've been doing a fair amount of traveling since last year, and decided that I love traveling when I can at least get premium economy. 😂 Since I used to be a deal blogger, I've always done ok with finding affordable trips, but I'm looking to elevate my game and learning a lot from The Daily Drop, whose "mission is to help new and seasoned travelers maximize credit card rewards, use miles and points smarter, and explore the world for cheap."
- I've also discovered that needy dogs and traveling don't go well together. One option is to bring Stella along, which means finding pet-friendly places to stay and if flying is involved, then figuring that part out. She's small, which is good because I fly a lot on Alaska and Hawaiian Airlines, which have the smallest carrier limits I've seen - this is our carrier,* which has held up well and has some great features like an extra compartment that pops out, two ways to access from above, and a travel strap on the side for attaching to a suitcase handle.
The other option is leaving her at home, but she's a very attached dog who gets depressed when she's alone or even just not with her people. That makes traveling with my family but without her difficult. I've put the word out that I'm looking for a dog sitter who will let Stella come to them, so she at least she doesn't have to be alone, so 🤞. (I have sitters who would visit and feed her, but that wouldn't be enough for her.) - I guess this would be a good time for a Stella update, which is that she's great and a much loved family member. I wouldn't trade her for the world, but I did not anticipate having a dog who's super chill in most ways but hates being left alone. Her favorite thing is hanging out on the couch with her loved ones ... and treats. Lots and lots of treats. Apparently she has what's called velcro syndrome and possibly separation anxiety (not uncommon in rescues and lap dogs, which is quite the double whammy). I'm working on reducing both, although I don't think we'll ever be able to completely eliminate them. I have no idea what her first six years were like - I don't think she was abused, but she wasn't super well-cared for either, based on her health - so I'll always just be happy that she's settled in so well with our family.
We used the classic IKEA FRAKTA bags* to transport stuff home from college - but Stella thought they were for her! 😂😂 - As for me, I've been applying for jobs, taking care of my family, and decluttering the house. I've been selling on Poshmark and Vinted, in addition to donating to Goodwill and the local animal shelter (I'm delighted the shelter will take old towels and linens). This is my Poshmark referral code, which gets you a $10 credit when you sign up. This is my Vinted referral code, which gets you up to a $15 credit ($5 for listing 3 items and $10 when you make your first sale). I'll get the same amounts when you use my code, so thank you if you do! And just let me know if you want me to share more about my selling experiences. (FYI, I've been a Poshmark seller for a while, but am quite new to Vinted.)
Finally, important news: the Pumpkin Spice Latte returns to Starbucks on August 25. In anticipation - and in the hope of enjoying PSL flavors without all of the calories and sugar - I bought the Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte* creamer but it's nothing like the actual PSL. So I'm counting down until the 25th!
