I was going to share some thoughts about the challenge, but instead of writing, I spent most of the day thinking about my friend J. For a while, we kept in touch in spurts – we’d talk several times during the same week, and then not talk for months. A few years ago, she moved several hundred miles away and we’ve pretty much kept in touch via sporadic email exchanges and Christmas cards. Today I found out that her husband was killed in an accident yesterday. It’s really hit me hard because they have two boys, just like us. The youngest is just two months older than my oldest, so J. and I were pregnant at the same time. J.’s oldest is about three years older than them. And I get teary every time I think of her boys having to grow up without their dad.
Unfortunately, I only met J.’s husband once. So I can’t do what I really wish I could do, which is write down some memories that they can read when they’re older and have a little piece of their dad back.
Since J. and I aren’t that close, I’m a little at a loss as to what I can do for her. I did send out a note today that included some money. I have no idea what their financial situation is, whether her husband had adequate life insurance, etc. But even if he did, it will probably take a little while for the policy to pay out. So I wrote that she should use the money for whatever she needs, or she could add it to the boys’ college fund. I may also be contributing to a group gift later, but we’ll have to see about that.
I just wish that I could give more.